男性和女性互相交流时的思维差异:读《你误会了我》

Notes on Reading You Just Do Not Understand: Men and Women in Conversation

美国心理学和社会学家德博拉·坦嫩出版了著作《你误会了我》,该书用大量日常生活中的对话为佐证,说明男性和女性相互交流时,因为各自立场不同,思维方式差异,导致彼此的不理解而产生隔阂,指出当两性各自理解彼此的差异,并不再用自己的标准去衡量对方的时候,就可以减少误会,避免冲突,防止婚姻破裂。

This article introduces and reviews You Just Do Not Understand： Men and Women in Conversation. by Deborah Tannen, an American psychologist and sociologist, who concludes in his work with lots of daily conversations that differences in their points of view and ways of thinking, as well as their expectation about close relationships cause men and women to be frustrated with each other in inti- mate relationships, especially marriage. Finally, Tannen reassures us that learning about these differences can help us a great deal： if cou- ples really realize their differences, and no longer measure the other with their own standard, misunderstanding may be reduced, conflicts may be avoided, and splits may be prevented.