My old ayi(cleaner)has a warm heart and a sharp tongue,a rare combination in today's cold world.She would give you half of anything she had to eat,and 10 of anything she had to say.Given my limited Chinese,perhaps...My old ayi(cleaner)has a warm heart and a sharp tongue,a rare combination in today's cold world.She would give you half of anything she had to eat,and 10 of anything she had to say.Given my limited Chinese,perhaps she was repeating herself in an effort to make me understand.It paid off,as eventually I understood virtually everything she had to say,largely because she had two topics of interest to discuss with me.The first was how cute my former dog was in comparison to the current dog,and the second was how I had wasted money buying some foolish foreign thing.展开更多
I'm not really talking about all Chinese people here,I'm talking about the elderly Chinese people in my family and much of their cohort.Here's their deal:no matter what the weather is,it will kill you.You,...I'm not really talking about all Chinese people here,I'm talking about the elderly Chinese people in my family and much of their cohort.Here's their deal:no matter what the weather is,it will kill you.You,a foreigner,don't wear enough clothes.You have the wrong sort of umbrella.And those waterproof hiking boots you bought for scaling up a damp and scenic path are going to make you sick!You're not pregnant,are you?Ai-ya,your feet got wet:now your baby won't have eyes!展开更多
Ihavelived inChinaforover30 years,and while my Chinese isn't really fluent,I can converse about the important things that were never covered in The Practical Chinese Reader,such as leaky faucets or bratty children...Ihavelived inChinaforover30 years,and while my Chinese isn't really fluent,I can converse about the important things that were never covered in The Practical Chinese Reader,such as leaky faucets or bratty children.I can even carry on a conversation on the phone,although a co-worker pointed out that the person on the other end of the line wouldn't mistake me for a Beijinger,but perhaps as someone from Hebei.Mindful of the fact that many of life's emergencies are not really covered in most guidebooks,I have a laminated list of emergency words and phrases taped next to my front door,just in case.This has paid dividends for itself many times over.展开更多
I can't use my electronic ID card to enter OR exit the compound and building where I live.Why,I'm not sure:it worked just fine this morning,but when I came home from work a few minutes ago,my card failed to re...I can't use my electronic ID card to enter OR exit the compound and building where I live.Why,I'm not sure:it worked just fine this morning,but when I came home from work a few minutes ago,my card failed to release the locks so I could enter the compound gates,and didn't work on my building,either.This is NOT GOOD.展开更多
This doesn't happen often anymore,although at one time it was a daily occurrence.I'm teaching and the phone rings.I check the number:Work?Kid?Embassy?Nope.But hey,it could be important...It's a number I do...This doesn't happen often anymore,although at one time it was a daily occurrence.I'm teaching and the phone rings.I check the number:Work?Kid?Embassy?Nope.But hey,it could be important...It's a number I don't know,but it's not blocked,so I answer.A voice I don't recognize screams at me joyfully and rapidly for about a minute,then pauses,then asks,"Hao ma?"I stand stunned under the blitzkrieg of sound and tones and blink.The voice repeats,"Hao ma?"("OK?")and I stammer,in Chinese,"Please say that again,more slowly".展开更多
Pet owners-the kind,decent pet owners-know that to love a dog is to someday say goodbye to it.One ofmy dogs started having seizures,a hell of a thing to watch,and given his advanced age and the growth on his junk(his ...Pet owners-the kind,decent pet owners-know that to love a dog is to someday say goodbye to it.One ofmy dogs started having seizures,a hell of a thing to watch,and given his advanced age and the growth on his junk(his favorite toy)I took the horrible step of deciding to have him put to sleep.展开更多
Coming from a poor family as I do,and having worked my way through university as a waitress,I'm diligent about thank-yous and tips and go so far as to bring out a cold bottle of Pocari Sweat on hot days to workers...Coming from a poor family as I do,and having worked my way through university as a waitress,I'm diligent about thank-yous and tips and go so far as to bring out a cold bottle of Pocari Sweat on hot days to workers sweltering in the heat-or cups of hot water on freezing days.Shoot,I go so far as to pick up OTHER people's dog poo if it's on the sidewalk.展开更多
If you're in the typical Chinese apartment,you do not have control over the heating system and if you work in a Chinese office,you,the foreigner,have no control over the heat or the AC(and very little else,for tha...If you're in the typical Chinese apartment,you do not have control over the heating system and if you work in a Chinese office,you,the foreigner,have no control over the heat or the AC(and very little else,for that matter).The heat is officially turned on one day in November,and snapped off on another day in March.They're usually the 15th of each month,but can vary a bit,I understand,from region to region.If you're lucky,you live in a building which"tests the system"as early as October 31,which means your radiator pipes might belch forth a tiny amount of heat before mid-November.展开更多
文摘My old ayi(cleaner)has a warm heart and a sharp tongue,a rare combination in today's cold world.She would give you half of anything she had to eat,and 10 of anything she had to say.Given my limited Chinese,perhaps she was repeating herself in an effort to make me understand.It paid off,as eventually I understood virtually everything she had to say,largely because she had two topics of interest to discuss with me.The first was how cute my former dog was in comparison to the current dog,and the second was how I had wasted money buying some foolish foreign thing.
文摘I'm not really talking about all Chinese people here,I'm talking about the elderly Chinese people in my family and much of their cohort.Here's their deal:no matter what the weather is,it will kill you.You,a foreigner,don't wear enough clothes.You have the wrong sort of umbrella.And those waterproof hiking boots you bought for scaling up a damp and scenic path are going to make you sick!You're not pregnant,are you?Ai-ya,your feet got wet:now your baby won't have eyes!
文摘Ihavelived inChinaforover30 years,and while my Chinese isn't really fluent,I can converse about the important things that were never covered in The Practical Chinese Reader,such as leaky faucets or bratty children.I can even carry on a conversation on the phone,although a co-worker pointed out that the person on the other end of the line wouldn't mistake me for a Beijinger,but perhaps as someone from Hebei.Mindful of the fact that many of life's emergencies are not really covered in most guidebooks,I have a laminated list of emergency words and phrases taped next to my front door,just in case.This has paid dividends for itself many times over.
文摘I can't use my electronic ID card to enter OR exit the compound and building where I live.Why,I'm not sure:it worked just fine this morning,but when I came home from work a few minutes ago,my card failed to release the locks so I could enter the compound gates,and didn't work on my building,either.This is NOT GOOD.
文摘This doesn't happen often anymore,although at one time it was a daily occurrence.I'm teaching and the phone rings.I check the number:Work?Kid?Embassy?Nope.But hey,it could be important...It's a number I don't know,but it's not blocked,so I answer.A voice I don't recognize screams at me joyfully and rapidly for about a minute,then pauses,then asks,"Hao ma?"I stand stunned under the blitzkrieg of sound and tones and blink.The voice repeats,"Hao ma?"("OK?")and I stammer,in Chinese,"Please say that again,more slowly".
文摘Pet owners-the kind,decent pet owners-know that to love a dog is to someday say goodbye to it.One ofmy dogs started having seizures,a hell of a thing to watch,and given his advanced age and the growth on his junk(his favorite toy)I took the horrible step of deciding to have him put to sleep.
文摘Coming from a poor family as I do,and having worked my way through university as a waitress,I'm diligent about thank-yous and tips and go so far as to bring out a cold bottle of Pocari Sweat on hot days to workers sweltering in the heat-or cups of hot water on freezing days.Shoot,I go so far as to pick up OTHER people's dog poo if it's on the sidewalk.
文摘If you're in the typical Chinese apartment,you do not have control over the heating system and if you work in a Chinese office,you,the foreigner,have no control over the heat or the AC(and very little else,for that matter).The heat is officially turned on one day in November,and snapped off on another day in March.They're usually the 15th of each month,but can vary a bit,I understand,from region to region.If you're lucky,you live in a building which"tests the system"as early as October 31,which means your radiator pipes might belch forth a tiny amount of heat before mid-November.
